Uncle Leo

I think everyone has an uncle who is a little…different. One who is convinced a cook is anti-Semitic because he overcooked his hamburger. One you catch shoplifting in a bookstore but who justifies it by saying senior citizens have an advantage because they can always blame--use--senility for stealing. One who actually has a criminal past and you learn it was a crime of passion. One who thinks his son is much better than you and tells you all the time. One who’ll reprimand you if you “disrespect” him by not immediately saying “hello” upon seeing him. One whose eyebrows are completely burned off because he left a can of oven cleaner in the oven which exploded and his eyebrows are drawn back on with an eyebrow pencil, by your best female friend, that look like a clown’s or drag queen’s. One whose last name you don’t know. And one who makes you laugh because he’s just so peculiar.